Always remember to brush your teeth, children. Otherwise, you can have some nasty medical conditions.
“I know a doctor. She told me a story (EDIT: that she heard from another doctor) about how this guy came into the ER, an absolute nervous wreck. He was brushing his teeth for the first time in a couple of years (he was homeless and couldn’t afford toothbrushes or toothpaste) when he found a maggot in his mouth. This frequently happened over the course of 3 days, and he self-diagnosed himself with oral myiasis. Now, this guy was bats**t afraid of bugs, so he tried to get ’em out via the quickest way possible – ipecac. He didn’t think that one through and ended up vomiting shiploads of maggots before calling 911. The doc sympathized with him. I’d freak out, too, if I barfed up fifty maggots. S**t’s scary.”