Health

Brutal Food Poisoning Experiences that Will Ruin Any Meal

Oh, what a wonderful honeymoon. “My wife and I are world travelers, but she’s relatively new to the game. I’ve been to 47 countries and wanted… Trista - August 5, 2021

Oh, what a wonderful honeymoon.

“My wife and I are world travelers, but she’s relatively new to the game. I’ve been to 47 countries and wanted to take her to Thailand for our 3-week honeymoon. While it’s awesome being able to buy a meal for 3 USD per person, you probably shouldn’t do it. I knew this, but we were in the middle of nowhere, and we got desperate. We walked into a street-side cafe, which appeared to be the only food around for miles. I was fine for the remainder of the day. When I woke up at 4 am, things were different. I bolted to the bathroom of our hotel – which wasn’t a separate room from the bedroom, mind you – and I was exploding from both ends simultaneously,” explains [redacted].

“Every 20 minutes, I’d have to sit my butt on the toilet and grab a trash can, emptying whatever little I had in my system out. I showered after every episode and tried to get what little sleep I could. My wife, luckily, was fine, aside from having to endure the wonderful smells I was providing. She went out to buy several gallons of water for me as I needed them. My stomach finally settled around 1 am the following day. My body was wrecked, though – I was unable to move significantly for two days due to severe muscle pain. We spent those two days watching movies in bed and at the hotel’s pool, so it wasn’t a total loss, but we weren’t able to go exploring.”

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When food poisoning is for sale.

“I made the massive mistake of eating at a $1 Chinese food joint on Hollywood Blvd back in the 90s when I was a teen. It hit me that night, and I was woken up from a dead sleep. I was shaking and shivering, with my stomach turning back flips. So, I raced to the toilet and vomited violently for several minutes. I got a glass of water and weakly made my way back to bed. Then, I took a few sips of water. That came back up within minutes. I wished I were dead,” shares 46andtwojustahead.

“It got progressively worse. I spiked a fever of about 104. And I couldn’t keep anything down. I was supposed to be working, and I tried my best. However, I got sent to quarantine. I crawled into bed, and evidently, Then, I lost consciousness for three days. My friends came searching for me on the 3rd day and managed to rouse me from my unconscious state. They then coaxed me into eating a couple of crackers as well as taking tiny sips of water. I couldn’t eat Chinese food for about ten years after that episode.”

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Food poisoning took the whole team out.

“I was on a traveling softball team, about age 11. We had an early-morning tournament out of town, so we all stayed in a hotel that served breakfast. That morning before heading to the tournament, the entire team and their families ate breakfast at the hotel. My little brother was being super wild, so my dad decided to take him to the nearby McDonald’s that had a play place so that he could wind him down some. We get to the tournament when our team starts dropping like flies. Round the base, hurk, and rally! The coach was passed out under a shade tree near the dugout,” says Booner999.

“Some of the parents were laying on the concrete bathroom floor. To make matters worse, the temps were well over 100 that day. The park had to come out and put dirt on the fields we played in because all of us girls had puked all over the place. There was one other team who was going through the same thing, and they stayed at the same hotel we did. The only two people who didn’t get sick from this mess were my dad and brother. It still gives me nightmares thinking about all that puke.”

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What a crumby workday.

“I have had some pretty cruddy food poisoning scenarios before, but thankfully was always able to take off from work or school and rest. However, one of the more inconveniently timed bouts of food poisoning was while on a work trip to some tiny African country. My first time in Africa, actually. We were in a small but nice hotel but had a lot of work to do locally. I do not know if it was the food at the hotel or from the site where I worked, but a couple of days into the trip (and the most important day of the trip for me / my expertise, as other parts had been duel / more geared towards my clients and coworkers from a different section) and I barely slept,” shares BigBearSD.

“Was crapping my guts out all night long. I used up all of the TP and had to request more. I used all of that up, too, felt embarrassed, and just took to washing my butt in the cold shower after every s@#%. This kept up into the morning. I took various medicines I had brought with me to protect against the African Trots, but man was that morning rough. I sucked it up, got ready for work, and did my job. It was very hot and humid out, but I didn’t want to drink, let alone eat anything, for fear of having an instant case of the shivering squirts. That was a 12 to 14-hour workday. But thankfully, by the end of it, I was feeling a lot better, still not 100%, but okay enough.”

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Food poisoning is a sure way to ruin a concert for yourself.

“I worked security at Bonnaroo in 2005-2006. I went the first couple of years and found my way into getting paid to go and bring a bunch of college friends along. Well, somehow the 2nd day of 06, someone left out an entire pallet of lunches from the day before. They were distributed to the staff unknowingly. I was one of the unlucky ones. Unfortunately, this news didn’t hit me physically or by word of mouth until after I partook in some magic mushrooms after my shift was over. However, before the headliner Radiohead. The s@#%/puke tornado dance in a sauna of a port a potty isn’t something I’d wish on my worst enemy,” shares ThinkinWhisky.

“After an eternity contemplating every decision I’ve ever made in life, I was escorted back to staff camping. The next morning I was expected to be at my post at 7 am. During the walk, I leaked a rancid ham sandwich down my leg and ran to the treeline to puke. It would not be the last time I used explosive diarrhea to get out of work. However, it still remains my most legitimate use of it. I spent the remainder of the day ruining port a potties which went from “sauna” to “7th circle of hell” hot under the June Tennessee sun. I avoid Radiohead like the plague to this day.”

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